Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
Using the only finger i can move, i calculated body mass, intake and time. It's mathematically impossible for me to still have this hangover at 9pm. I passed out at 8pm last night. Fuck vodka.
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
Randomize
