It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
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