Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
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