I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
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