Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
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