drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
Is it acceptable to pay for WiFi on flights solely for the purpose of getting on Tinder to find a sugar daddy on the plane that doesn’t mind upgrading me to first class?
Do it. You’re flying for two weddings. You’re gonna need that first class.
where are my pants?
in the oven.
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
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