i just walked in on my sister drunkenly sobbing to sarah mclachlan. its time for an intervention.
didn't that happen to you last weekend?
shut up.
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
