Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
Randomize
