Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize
