so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
