well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
