How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
Randomize
