Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
Randomize
