We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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