If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
Emergency nipple ring removal:vodka, tweezers, and vodka. Can you bring me a band-aid?
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
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