Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
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