look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
Randomize
