The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
come pick me up. please. i just puked in my lap. bring pants.
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
I had to cum in my sink.
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
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