There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
Randomize
