The first thing on our $10,000 damage bill was "condoms in the main drain"
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
i think im in europe. pls send help
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
Randomize
