Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
whose parrot is this?
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize