508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
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