"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize