normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
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