i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
