Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
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