how can u be prego again
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
Randomize
