is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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