i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
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