do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
Such a big mess for such a small penis
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