BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
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