I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
Randomize