The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
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