i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
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