he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
Randomize
