I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
