Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Randomize
