I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize
