You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
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