He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
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