I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
Randomize
