Welp...herpes.
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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