Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
Randomize
