I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
Randomize
