Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
we made out on top of his cat.
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
Randomize
