i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Randomize
