Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
