nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
Randomize
