But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
Randomize
