At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
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